TL;DR

So once again, I have let a few months slip by without posting. Man, that's a nasty habit I am developing.

I know that excuses aren't really my style, but if I was going to make an excuse, my personal life has been a bit of a roller-coaster recently. Luckily, I haven't let my fitness routine slip, but unfortunately life pretty much drained me of any extra energy to do anything else.

Have you ever felt that your life is so exhausting, that you are happy with just existing? Not sure if that makes sense, but basically for a while back there, I would get up, work out, go to work, come home, and sit in front of the TV until I fell asleep, then start the whole routine again the next morning. That was all I had the energy to do.

I am not going to go into it, but basically pretty rough shit has been going on in my professional life. It wasn't anyone's fault, but it was a pretty tough situation that started a whole existential crisis about what I was doing with my life, was I doing the right thing, am I capable of doing more... and then when I thought I didn't have enough emotional energy to deal with anything else, BAM! Death hit. 

It was Mr MFC's grandad. I don't think he would mind me saying that it was expected, he had been ill for some time, but it didn't make things any easier. Losing someone close to you never is.

That was a couple of months ago now, and it's just now that I have started to feel like I am coming back to life again. I think I still have some way to go, but I feel now like I am taking positive steps to change things things, rather than just sitting back and letting stuff happen to me.

So, with all that chat out of the way, let me update you on the stuff that has been going on in my life since I chatted to you last:

• I went to Crete for a week and discovered my love for Greek yoghurt and honey
• I have run in not one, but two races!
• I have gained 6lbs in weight (but it might not necessarily be a bad thing...)
• My ankle is still giving me hassle, but not so much that I have had to stop the running. Thankfully, I am getting fitted for my own custom made orthotic which should make things even better!
• I have handed in my notice at my current job (see reference to "rough shit" above) and start my new job in two weeks. Yes, I am cacking it.

But enough about me, how have you been? :)

Someone scratch me

So I am in a bit of a huffy mood today. I just feel minging. Why you ask? Uch, it might be something to do with this:

Basically a few months ago I was prescribed a skin cream by the doctor, which I reacted badly to. So the doctor, being the caring and thorough professional that they are, referred me to the dermatologist to have a skin patch test.

Now, I was imagining the sample size would be quite small, and I'd maybe have something about the size of an A5 sheet of paper put on the base of my back. Silly me. When the nurse wheeled out all the samples she had to administer, I wondered whether there would be enough room on me to fit them all. There were 132 in total.

132.

And I'm not sure if you've ever had a huge selection of irritants stuck on your back, but I'll tell you now. It fricken kills. First comes the tightness, where you can barely move because the skin on your back has been glued together, but that loosens off quick enough. Just in time for the itching. MY GOD the itching.

It's taking pretty much every ounce of my being not to rip this thing off and go to town on the nearest tree like Baloo...

But I have managed to resist. Thankfully I only have to endure it one more night, then it gets taken off tomorrow morning.

Unfortunately, it doesn't end there. Did I mention I am not allowed to shower during this?

Yeah, the last shower I had was on Monday morning, and I'm not allowed to shower again until Friday afternoon. Delightful, right?!

At first I thought that I would be able to wash after I got the patch taken off, but no. I have to keep the whole area dry until my last appointment on Friday, to make sure they catch any delayed reactions. Funzies!!!

If you haven't gathered already, this puts any form of excess perspiration out of the question for this week. That includes - you guessed it - any form of vigorous exercise. Which means I am having to put my training on hold for a week. With my 10k just around the corner, that is mighty frustrating.

I know I know, it will be good when I am done to have a comprehensive list of things that cause my skin to react and I'll know to avoid, but right now, with my back alight with all the horrible itching, it's difficult to be positive.

Pity me. :(

Drugged up March

I know these moany posts aren't everyone's cup of tea, but I have to vent. Plus, it's my blog, so screw it. If you don't like it, go and read someone else's blog! (I don't mean that, sorry. Please stay. I love all my readers. Sit down, I'll make you a cup of tea. JUST DON'T LEAVE ME!!!)

Anyway. The ankle still hurts. BAH.

Don't get me wrong, there is a definitely a vast improvement from when I stopped running six weeks ago, but it's not the complete miraculous recovery I was hoping for.

I went to the orthopaedic assessment clinic as planned, but unfortunately it wasn't as fruitful as I was hoping it was going to be. Don't get me wrong, the doctor was lovely, but she hadn't really told me anything I hadn't heard already. Just the usual "nothing wrong with the ankle structure, WOW your biomechanics are screwed, here are some exercises, give it time... blah blah blah..."

Well guess what, I have given it time. I have given it time with bells on. I have paid my dues, I am fed up and I want to get running again NOW!!!

So you could say I was pretty bummed. Shortly after I went back to my physio/psycho therapist and vented. I think she was relieved that there was nothing there that she had missed, and that she had been right in thinking there was nothing wrong with the ankle structure itself. That got me thinking... is there any way that this could just be a chronic niggle with no physiological purpose? Quite possibly, she replied.

If that's the case, maybe I should shift my focus from healing my ankle injury (when there isn't anything to heal) to breaking the psychosomatic pain feedback cycle that it has left behind. So, I have started on a simple course of ibuprofen to block the pain for two weeks, and hopefully once I come off them, my stupid brain will realise the pain served no purpose and will block it out for good. Well... that is the plan anyway. :)

I've done "no run February".... so I am following it up with "Drugged up March!"

Hmm, maybe need to work on the name a bit. It sounds like I have lost it a little... Nevermind. You all know what I mean.

Besides, I have a 10k at the end of May to train for so I have to get started up again pretty soon. I've spotted a good training plan by Bupa that should get me 10k fit again, but it takes 8 weeks, which means ideally I should be up and going for it in about 10 days.

But, I'll just wait and see if the ibuprofen plan works before I make a solid decision. I'm sure I'll get there one way or another ;)

Sorry

Wow... I can't believe I let this blog die.

I remember when I first started my blog, I was scoping out other health/fitness feeds and came across a fair few that had been abandoned. Immediately I assumed that the authors had just thrown their dumbbells to one side with an almighty "fuck it" and decided to drown themselves in pile of Ben and Jerry's and Doritos instead.

So I will forgive you, dear reader, for thinking that the same fate had become of me. Let's be honest, I freaking LOVE B&Js.

I'm pleased to report however, that it has not. I'm still running (kind of), swimming, lifting weights and being sensible about what I eat (although not immune to the odd Dorito binge - everything in moderation and all that).

So why did I lose momentum? Well, the previous few posts should probably give you a clue:

And yes - I am STILL co-ordinating with my toenails!

That freaking ankle.

It has been around five months, and it still hasn't fixed itself yet. I guffed it, and I guffed it good.

So there were several reasons why I couldn't bring myself to write on the blog:

• I was feeling pretty miserable at times, and who the hell would want to read my emo whiny shit about a twingy ankle when there are people out there much worse off than me?
• This injury has just gone to confirm that I am indeed an idiot. I have so much more to learn about sport and fitness, so why should I go preaching to anyone else about it when I know naff all?
• And... er... laziness.

I have even abandoned my wonderful Twitter account... the account that showed so much promise (a retweet from Ellen Degeneres? Hello!). But, the other night I decided to idly browse my feed, and I came across this tweet from one of my heroes, Linford Christie:

A LIVING DOG IS BETTER THAN A DEAD LION
— Linford Christie (@ChristieLinford) January 30, 2013

I decided to take those words to heart. I am not perfect "lion", I get that. But I love what I do and try to do it with gusto. And this blog has become a part of that. So, I am going to revive this "dog".

Here goes!

I'm back... Kind of

Just a quick update for you -

The ankle is still giving me jip. It has cost me both my 10k races, so I'm pretty devastated. I would never have guessed that the little twinge two months ago would have had me off my feet for so long.

But I am tired of sitting on my backside and feeling sorry for myself. My physio has given me the green light to run, albeit for very short distances, so I am slowly easing myself back into it.

She reckons that my ankle is just complaining after months of hard training in worn out footwear. So, I got a new pair of trainers, and while they aren't the comfiest, they certainly provide my feet with lots of support.

My foot is getting better. Just very very verrrry slowly.

But I refuse to give up. Watch this space.

p.s: Mr MFC completed his marathon in 4 and a half hours. What a mancake.

Still Guffed

So in case the three week long silence hasn't given it away... my ankle is STILL giving me bother. I haven't been out running in about a month now, and it's really starting to get me down.

I have been to the physio, who says I have tendonitis. The really bad news is my River Ness 10k is looking kind of unlikely now. :(

However, I do have mighty colourful strapping!

So yeah. Kind of gutted at the moment if I'm frank with you. The fact that it is dragging on so long is frustrating, however I'm still doing everything I can to get back on track. I'm still swimming and doing the bikes, plus fitting in easy weight training and yoga when I can.

I have another appointment on Tuesday, where I will be fitted with some fancy insoles for my trainers to stop this kind of injury happening again, then I can probably go out running for short distances. But as I said, the 10k next week isn't looking good. Pretty devastated.

Anyway, I'll keep you all updated....

FFS

I really only have myself to blame. Yup, my ankle is playing up again.

I went on it too much, too soon, and now I am suffering the consequences. Again. Sigh.

So its back to cross training, which means more bikes (YAWN) and more upper body focus than you can shake a stick at. I'll start looking like Jodie Marsh if I'm not careful *shudder*

Image via

Okay, okay, not quite. But still, I'm sitting here on the couch looking longingly out at the wonderful sunshine and wishing I could go out for a dash.

All is not lost though, I've been using this injury to get into my swimming again. There's a pool near where I live that has recently reopened after a fairly hefty refurbishment, and I must admit it really is quite nice. I went with Mr MFC this morning and busted out a few lengths, and I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed it. The pool opens really early too, so I might be able to get a couple of pre-work sessions in later in the week, assuming that my ankle doesn't decide to get its act together.

Ho hum, anyway we'll see.

Oh yeah - one more thing. I'm logging again.

Sorry folks, but my holiday blow out has kind of caught up with me, and early last week I hit what I call my "alarm bell" weight, which is basically 5lbs over my target.

Yes yes, it was probably all water weight. In fact, I KNOW it was mostly water weight because after only a week I have nearly lost it all again, but I still think I need to step back into line a bit.

Everything had been going really well up until the holiday though, so logging again is just a temporary measure to get me back down where I want to be. Once I've done that, I'll be back off it again. Hopefully for good.

I'm baaaack!

Hey everybody!

Good news - I've recovered from my ankle injury and am BACK with a vengeance!

I've actually been off on holiday too and had high hopes for sprucing up the blog while I had some spare time, but alas I have been too busy running around on my FUNCTIONAL ankle!  :D

Seriously - I've been like a kid at Christmas. I normally rack up about 20km a week, but in the past seven days I have done 35! The reasons for this are twofold: firstly, fixed ankle (yay!); and secondly, I've been up in Aberdeen so I've been using my runs to do a little bit of exploring. 

In my opinion, Aberdeen is quite underrated and in fact a really beautiful city - it was quite nice to get lost somewhere different for a change. Oh yes, there was a lot of getting lost. My personal favourite was when I ran out of pavement and got stuck up to my knees in grass while wearing my short-shorts...  still it all adds to the fun, eh?

However, due to lack of kit (I refuse to cart free weights about in my rucksack), I've been kind of neglecting my muscle toning. I intend to be on it again next week though, and I might through a little bit of yoga in too... we'll see. 

Anyway, that's been me for the past week... how are things with you? ;)

I'm on Twitter!

Okay so this isn't really news - I have been on Twitter for years, but I have decided that a lot of the followers of my regular personal account won't want to hear about my vague ramblings about running, so I have decided to break off my fitness updates and put them into their own feed. Think of it as a kind of digital multiple personality disorder.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you @littlemissmfc.


I'm using it to collate the most interesting health stories, connect with other health fanatics like myself and of course, publicise my blog posts. So if that sounds like the kind of thing you're into, then go ahead and give it a cheeky follow!

I'm still trying to get my head around the HUGE health and fitness community though. Who should I follow? Do you have a health Twitter feed? If so, let me know in the comments!

UPDATE! Still not logging!

Hi Guys,

So a couple of weeks a go I decided to stop using MyFitnessPal. We had been in a pretty involved relationship for over a year, but the time was right to break it off. It wasn't the site's fault: it was me. My goals have changed since I started using it and I couldn't see myself using it forever.

Anyway. I have already talked at great length about why I have stopped using it, so I'm not going to bore you with that again. Instead, I thought I would let you know how I'm getting on and reveal if there is indeed a life beyond logging everything you eat.

Here's the good news: I'm still not logging, and my weight has been steady! Hooray! Okay, well, not quite. I gained a pound or two at the beginning, and I tend to bounce around that 10st 2lb mark now, but to be honest I don't grudge that little bit of extra weight. Of course, if the scale goes up any higher (10st 5lb is my "alarm bell" weight) then I will do something about it, but at the moment I'm fairly happy where I am.

I seem to have replaced logging with routine. Instead of writing down everything I eat, I follow a rigid pattern that I know won't exceed my calorie limit (and believe me, I have done plenty of logging to know what exceeds my calorie limit and what doesn't). I'm a bit more lax on weekends and holidays, but I think the routine below comes in under my calorie limit, so I have a little bit of leeway to indulge every so often.

But anyway. A normal day for me goes like this:

6am (Pre-breakfast)
A small glass of smoothie or a handful of fruit

9am (Actual breakfast)
A large bowl of cornflakes with semi-skimmed milk and a cup of coffee

11am (Mid morning snack)
A piece of fruit, e.g. an orange, pear, peach or plum

12.30pm (Lunch)
A small bowl of soup with brown bread and a banana

3.00pm (Mid afternoon snack)
A small serving of dried fruit and/or nuts and a cup of tea

6.00pm (Evening snack)
A small snack e.g. a pot of yoghurt, a piece of fruit, a couple of oatcakes or crispbread

8.00pm (Dinner)
A normal sized meal with a sweet treat afterwards (e.g. rice pudding or gasp! ice cream)

9.30pm (Late evening snack)
A cereal bar or something similar - but only if I am feeling peckish

I know I know, it looks quite regimented, but this routine is only a baby step in the right direction towards eating normally. I look forward to the day that I can just eat what I need without thinking about it, but until that day comes I think that this is a good halfway house between normality and logging.

But just in case I was wondering if I had done the right thing... a couple of days ago I logged for the day. Just to see what would happen. I ate pretty much to the above routine and found that after I had my evening meal, I was still about 500 kcals under. So what did I do? I gorged on 500 kcals worth of biscuits. Was I hungry? No. But just KNOWING I had those calories left to spend made me reach for the biscuit tin. So yeah, I think I have definitely made the right decision.

And just like that, I have made another step towards a normal, healthy life. Feeling kind of chuffed with myself right now. Onwards and upwards!

Why I'm Not Logging Any More

Okay, this is a big step for me. It's scaring me shitless but I have to do it at some point, so I have decided that the time is now.

I've stopped logging.

For those of you scratching your head and wondering what "logging" means, I'll briefly explain. What I mean by "logging' is recording every calorie I burn and every bite I eat. Pretty much everyone who has attempted to lose weight ever has done this in some form or another: whether is be noting down calories with a notepad and pen, counting weightwatchers points, using a phone app, or whatever.

For me, it was inputting my calorie burn and intake to a FANTASTIC little site called MyFitnessPal. I've been a member for over a year, and I pretty much owe my entire weight loss to this site. It has an incredible user-built database with pretty much every food you can imagine, an incredible supportive community and best of all, it's free.

You simply tell the site how much you want to lose, and it gives you a calorie allowance to abide to each day. It also has a fantastic app which is available for iPhone, Android and Blackberry, so you can even log on the go.

I just want it to be known that I endorse this tool 100%. My decision to stop logging has nothing to do with the site. It's just... my personal goals have changed, and I think I have got to a point where I need to learn to get on without it.

I have been maintaining my weight (give or take a couple of pounds) for the best part of eight months now. However, barely a day goes by when I don't log every morsel I eat.

There have been a couple of days where I haven't logged, but this has normally been an intentional decision where I know I'd be pigging out and didn't see the point, like when I was on my holiday or experiencing emotional turmoil.

And days like these (but without the broom)

But for the most part, whenever I ate something, seconds later (or sometimes before), I would get my Blackberry out and input what I was eating and how much into the MyFitnessPal app or logging on to the website. When you look at it objectively, you've got to admit that it's pretty odd behaviour.

But it became second nature for me. It became habit - like washing your hands after you've been to the loo. If I didn't log something I ate - it would just niggle at me.

And don't even get me started on exercise! As soon as I finished my cool down, I was logging the calories burned into MyFitnessPal so I could find out how much extra food I could eat.

There. I said it. I exercised so I could eat.

But that's not the point of exercise - and I know that. I love all the other benefits of exercise, the way it makes me feel and its potential to make me stronger. I would like to think that even if exercise didn't burn any calories at all, I would still do it. But I've got to admit, being able to eat that chocolate bar afterwards totally guilt-free is a pretty sweet perk.

So all of these things have been niggling at me for a while: the fact that it is quite odd behaviour, the fact that I was so reliant on it and the fact it kind of skewed my attitude towards exercise. But the straw that broke the horse's back happened a couple of weeks ago.

I was sitting in front of the TV in the evening. I had just finished eating a pretty nice meal, and it was about 9pm. I was just lounging away in the sofa, when a little thought popped into my head.

"Fancy a biscuit?"

"No," I told myself. "I've just had my dinner and I feel pretty full."

"But you have enough calories left..."

And when that thought popped into my head, I knew I had to stop logging. It was giving me an excuse to eat stuff even when I wasn't feeling hungry. Incidentally, I did go for that biscuit, because you know, I DID have the calories left.

But if I hadn't been logging, the thought wouldn't have even crossed my mind. The question I need to ask myself is not "do I have the calories left?" but rather "am I hungry?"

It's time to stop listening to a computer and listening my own body instead. After all, it's what most normal people do.

I just want to reiterate, this is not meant to put anyone off logging. If you are trying to lose weight, or even just trying to maintain your weight, then I fully encourage you to log. It certainly worked for me and is great for educating yourself on how much you should be feeding your body However, I personally feel like I'm at a stage where I know how much food my body needs, and I need to stand on my own two feet and maintain my weight by myself.

I'm going to watch my weight closely over the next couple of weeks, and if the numbers start to creep up, then I'll start logging again. But we'll see how it goes.

Wish me luck. :)

Nipping it in the bud

So I'm eating to a deficit again. In other words, I'm trying to lose weight.

There are two main reasons for this.

Firstly, my "I can eat anything I want, I just ran a half marathon" mentality has caught up with me, and I have gained 3.5 lbs (1.6 kg). Okay, I know it doesn't sound much, but I would much rather cut down for a couple of weeks to lose a lb or two than go for months on end trying to lose a good few stone. So, I'm nipping it in the bud.

Secondly, I have a beach holiday coming up. A PROPER beach holiday, with sand and sunshine and everything.

So, I have bought myself *deep breath*... a bikini.

I haven't worn a bikini in four years.

Needless to say, I am feeling a little apprehensive about the whole thing. So, if cutting down my calorie intake and ramping up my exercise regime for a couple of weeks is going to give my confidence a boost, I see no harm in it. Besides, I'm probably going to put all the weight right back on with all that scrummy holiday food! :p

Things are going well so far. I've been running a deficit of 500 kcals a day and combining it with Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred (review to come). After seven days, I have lost 2 lbs (nearly a kilo), although some of that is probably water weight, because a 500 kcal deficit is only supposed to lead to a 1 lb per week loss.

Still, if I continue like this, I am well on track on getting back to my ideal weight before I jet off.

Happy days! :D

My finish line photo

For your viewing pleasure.

If that's not the face of a WINNER, I don't know what is!

Sorry I've been off the grid for a while, more robust post coming soon. Promise! :)

What 35lbs Looks Like

Okay so people have been asking for a before/after picture for a while, so here it is (click the image for a closer look).

Apologies for the picture quality of the "before" - it was just a wee snapshot taken at a Halloween party 18 months ago.

If there's one thing I regret about this... (I hate this word but I'm going to use it anyway)... "journey"... it's that I never took a proper "before" picture of myself, but it was just because of the way the whole thing started.

Believe it or not, I didn't just wake up one morning and go "hum, I think I'm going to lose a shitload of weight today". The changes were all a bit more gradual than that. First, I started running. Then after about a month or so, I came across MyFitnessPal (which deserves a whole blog post in itself, so I won't go into it here). Then a couple of months later, I realised the importance of resistance training. A month or so after that, I got introduced to the wonders of Zumba. Then I thought I should learn to swim... and so on and so forth.

Sure, I do quite a lot of stuff now, but I took on each element of my current lifestyle organically, bit by bit. One thing just kind of flowed into another. Okay I know I'm starting to sound like some kind of  zenned-out hippy now, but you get my drift.

To be honest, I'm kind of glad it happened that way. I think if I had tried to take on everything at once, I would have just been so completely and utterly overwhelmed. I doubt I would have lasted a week. To be perfectly frank, I think that's why so many (another word I hate but gonna use anyway) "diets" fail. People think they can change their entire lifestyle overnight, but I know for sure that I couldn't.

Anyway, I just went on a total tangent there. Sorry. The point I'm trying to make is that I didn't have a definite "start" point in my weight loss. So I didn't weigh myself, take photos or do any of that stuff. I remember going onto one of those crazy machines in Boots around 2-3 weeks after I started running, which told me I was nearly 13 stone (182lbs for my American friends, 82.5k for everyone else), but I still maintain to this day that those scales were wrong. I reckon I was closer to 12 and a half stone (175lbs, 79.4kg). If I was to believe the Boots machine, I had a BMI of 29.2. That was 0.8 of a BMI point off being obese. OBESE.

I knew I was a little chunky, but I didn't know I was so close to being OBESE.

I also paid the extra 50p or whatever it was to get my body fat composition measured. That was a laugh. 35% body fat I was. That's pretty bad. Or so the slip told me anyway.

I wish I had kept the wee receipt as a souvenir but I was so disgusted with the numbers I chucked it as soon as I found a bin.

However, I did go on another one of those crazy machines at the pool last week, and I got another slip. Let's take a look at what it says for a comparison:

Okay, that's nowhere near as clear as I hoped it would be. Silly computer camera.

Basically my weight was 10st 2lbs (142lbs, 64.6kg) that day, but I tend to bounce around the 10st mark. My BMI was 22.6 (healthy weight, yipee) and my body fat percentage was 23.3%. According to the slip, that's slap bang between "good" and "excellent". I know that 35lbs in some people's book is pretty small fry, but to go from over a third body fat to less than a quarter... well what can I say, I'm chuffed with that.

And if I can do it, anyone can.

This Week

Every so often, there comes an event that makes you re-evaluate things.

I've just had one of those.

Without going into too much detail, things have got pretty heavy of late.

I've lost my sense of routine, and I'm not afraid to admit that when I lose my routine, my eating habits go to shit.

I also basically had to relocate pretty quickly, so I am currently stranded in a city without any of my training gear - no running, no weights, no nothing.

And I'm not sure when I'll get back.

Normal service will resume shortly - I hope.

You'll be the first to know when it does.

Oh, hello there.

Hello!

That's me up there, waving like an absolute goon.

Welcome to my blog.

ABOUT ME

I like to keep fit. I also like to shovel food into my face. The former I have to conscientiously work at, while the latter comes fairly naturally.

Despite this, I managed to lose 20% of my body weight in about eight months last year. I'm now trying to keep that weight off. Sometimes I find it fairly easy, while other times it is a massive pain in the ass.

Just like those folks in the Bupa ads, I'm just trying to find healthy.

I'll try and write about my attempt at life here.

Enjoy.

P.S: 

I am an idiot. Seriously.

I'm not a doctor, nurse, or any other medical professional, nor do I claim to be.

Any medical / dietary advice I put on here comes from my own personal experience and may not be suitable for everyone. You should seek medical advice before blindly following any of it.

All clear?! Excellent!

Then I shall begin.